Zombie Boot Camp Zombie Experience - The Major's Blog

Major Roy’s Zombie Survival And Apocalypse Avoidance Blog

 

Major Roy’s, what happens when the ammo runs out during the Zombie Apocalypse!

We have spoken about wheels what about weaponry?

Ideally everyone gravitates to firearms however where would you find a gun in the UK? You may be lucky and find a 12 gauge double barrelled shotgun in a farm house but in reality guns are as rare as hens teeth in the UK. Secondly there is more to firing a gun than pointing it at a zombie and pulling a trigger. Guns need reloading, cleaning and they have stoppages.

Lets go for the easier option say a rolling pin, big stick or a garden shovel – at least there at hand and no training if required to swing a garden fork, but is there?

In all probability you will come face to face with a zombie in a confined space so a shovel could be a hindrance I suggest a hatchet its a multi purpose tools. Besides hacking into the neck of a zombie its good for chopping fire wood and breaking into buildings.

Buy 1 now in fact buy 1 for all friends and family members. Have 1 under your bed keep 1 at work take 1 to the mall you never now when you will be confronted by a hoard of flesh eating zombies. Hatchets  will fit in the glove compartment of a car or van, fit in a hand bag or in a child’s buggy. Be prepared to hack and slash.

Don’t become zombie meat become a zombie killing machine.

A few top tips when using a hatchet:

Keep it sharp

Wear Gloves (leather preferably) bite proof

Clean it when used with neat bleach “don’t want to get contaminated”

Always strike at the base of the neck in particular the spine cut the signal from the brain to the body.

We also suggest if time permitting wear a pair of clear perspex safety goggles and a disposable face mask again “don’t get contaminated”

Do not wear short sleeves if possible to layers of clothing any leather jacket will protect you form scratches, scuffs and in many cases bites. No exposed skin exposed skin leads to possible contamination.

A motor cycle helmet is ideal with a visor there is no way any zombie is going to get its teeth through that.

Dummies die people who prepare survive.

My next blog will discuss what to pack if society comes to an abrupt end and the zombie hoards are wandering through your local shopping centre or if in the US a shopping mall.

Major Roy’s, top tips on surviving a zombie onslaught.

Is anyone out there still planning or thinking of preparing for the zombie apocalypse?

After 7 years of running Zombie Boot Camp I think I have done my homework.  Ask me a question I am sure I will have the answer or I now someone who does.

Here is my wish list:

Wheels

If you are planning to head out of the city and leave the chaos behind then get a car with some personality. I drive a 3 litre Nissan Navarra; boy has that car got attitude when it needs to. I am confident that it would lose no sleep driving through a hoard of the walking dead or anyone else who gets in your way.  It high suspension allows you to tackle high kerbs and rubble without breaking into a sweat. It also has the capacity to nudge other motorists living or dead out of the way.

Its simple engine allows you to drive it on anything heavy oil based so just pull over on the way to the hills and help yourself to the kerosene in anyone’s back yard.

The engine designed to meet the needs of the 3rd world so its design is simple and robust. If you are lucky enough to find a heavy machine gun just strap it to the cap and fire away. The super structure will just lap it up.

Every zombie evading planner at some stage will struggle with what to take with a Navarra don’t worry if you can fit it in the back the Navarra will carry it.

The pre- packing list needs to have at least 160 litres of fuel that’s a full tank and 4 x military steel jerry cans. Remember a tool box, engine oil, coolant and a functional spare wheel. I would also strongly suggest an air hose that runs of the cigarette lighter and a can of the tyre sealant which you can get from a new car. This means you have range and won’t have to mess around changing a spare wheel (remember the taxi scene in the Blackwall Tunnel in 28 Days later “stressful”)

I would also suggest a powerful cleaning agent, rubber gloves and a scraper to remove zombie gore from the windscreen. As with all army jeeps pack a jerry can of water, shovel (not spade), axe crow bar in case you get in a scrape.

We now are ready to go; but remember you will need a map/atlas as satnav will probably be down, a torch with 2 x sets of spare batteries and head torch. To be safe I have purchased the wife and I a full face motorcycle helmet. This is for 2 reasons one if we crash we are better protected in and out of the vehicle and imagine driving to Scotland without a windscreen.

Next week I will be discussing what to take or not to take.

In the interim consider booking zombie boot camp we will teach you lots of hot tips in fighting zombies up front and close.

Remember: zombie dust is the same as fairy dust “it just smells like shit”

Over and out

Roy